“I Know Your Worth, But Not Mine” – Finding Respect for Yourself

By: Carla León Celaya

It’s easy to say:

Becca Smouse (Photo Credit: Carla Leon Celaya/AZLatinos.com)

“He is so confident!”

“She is cute and she knows it!”

“He is so put together!”

“She is very disciplined.”

You may have all heard some or all of these phrases – and likely many more. And you may have even said them when referring to someone else. I know I have.

In what world do these descriptions develop? Toni Morrison – writer, editor and professor – has written several books and has won the Pulitzer Prize and Nobel Peace Prize. In her book, Song of Solomon, she asks:

“Could you really love somebody who was absolutely nobody without you? You really want somebody like that? Somebody who falls apart when you walk out the door? You don’t, do ­you? And neither does he. You’re turning over your whole life to him. Your whole life, girl. And if it means so little to you that you can just give it away, hand it to him, then why should it mean any more to him? He can’t value you more than you value yourself.”

Do you know your value? Do you stand behind your beliefs and values?

It’s hard to:

Speak your mind.

Take a compliment.

Forgive those who do you wrong.

Make your hobbies priorities (if your significant other doesn’t like to go for a hike, that’s perfectly fine!)

Highlight your interests.

Showcase your strengths.

Acknowledge your weaknesses.

Sometimes we have to “toot” our own horn, and that’a okay:

1. Hold your ground and highlight your asset. It means that you are connected with yourself and not that you’re conceited.
2. Don’t worry about what others think.
3. Don’t compromise your values to satisfy others.
4. Focus on keeping your body and mind happy.

As Aberihani said in Journey through the Power of the Rainbow: Quotations from a Life Made out of Poetry, “dare to love yourself as if you were a rainbow with gold at both ends.”