Are You Genuine? Fostering Authenticity in Relationships

(Featured Photo by: Carla León/AZLatinos.com)

By: Carla León Celaya

Are you genuine? You probably stopped scrolling the screen on your phone, leaned back and came up with an “IDK.”

Not too long ago, I came across Dr. Brené Brown’s ideas on authenticity. In her book, The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are, she says, “authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.”

This is so true; we have the power!

Then what’s the problem – why are we so plastic-like? It takes effort, consistency and nerve to be free; and all of these qualities require us to be present and take risks.

So here’s the task: think about your first date and answer the following questions.

1. Did you act “normal” or your “usual self” around him/her?
2. When he/she made a comment you didn’t agree with, what did you do?
3. Were you honest about your interests and hobbies?
4. Are you being sincere with yourself right now when answering these questions?

In order to harvest a healthy relationship—friendship, family, love or professional one—the foundation needs to be sturdy, and it all starts within. You can’t change someone else; you can’t control the actions of your neighbor, but you can dictate the way you react and carry yourself daily.

As the one of a kind, limited edition individual that you are, try this: at the end of each day take time to reflect on everything that happened. Pick a conversation, a reaction, or an emotion you had and write about it. Question your actions and thoughts—approach it in a way where you get to know yourself.

On Sundays, grab the journal from the shelf and re-read your notes. You will reconnect with your true self and without knowing it, authenticity will be knocking at your door!